changing aging

Firewalker has the same disease that took Petzel. It seems he wants to be close to me more often. It is not easy because of the smell. Is it the smell of death? I have smelt it before, Petzel, and when a close friend died from cancer. I let him lay with me whenever he wants. I don't push him away because of the smell, I put the top of my hand near my nose, and pet him gently.

Next week I go up to see my family. My mother is still in recovery from the stroke. The recovery could be the rest of her life, and maybe not. We all change, sometimes it's much more gradual.

I know it is more difficult for my Dad. I am sure he wants her back to what he thinks she should be. He has become a care-giver, his role in their relationship has changed. For her it just is. He has accepted his new role, and I hope he can accept how she has changed. For her it just is. It is so different for him, but not for her. I guess, this is a brain injury.

As I age, and change, I hope I can be accepting of this in others, Firewalker, my Mom, and myself.