do i really

I have an opportunity to participate in a show at the Mesa College Gallery with FIG, Feminist Image Group, but I am very conflicted with this prospect. I cannot wrap my head around the name of the group, "FIG" and what this stands for. At the meeting I went to yesterday they went over some of the things they've been doing.
There was a discussion about some of the exhibits, the intervention at the San Diego Art Fair, and the work at Quint Gallery by Ryan McGinness.

As I go over and over again in my head the name of the group and the discussion at the meeting, I am not at all comfortable with participating. I am not at all offended by the work of Ryan McGinness, and all artists have issues with getting representation for their work, female, and male. The conversations about the feminist concerns about women in the art world seems, to quote Sam Axe of Burn Notice, a  "bunch of bitchy little girls" I am ever to be apart of an art group I would like it to be a group that supports each other, without dumping on other artists, and in not focused solely on exhibits of their work.

Do I really compromise my principles in order to fluff up my resumé? The answer is: I cannot.


a most fortunate life

Today the rain came and cleaned the air.

And then there was a fraud alert on my debt card. The bank denied the transaction, contacted me, and cancelled that card, all within one hour.

My life truly is a fortunate one.


on TV

For the past 3 years I've had work rented and/or sold to the movie and/or TV industry. Last night was the first time I've seen any of this work in a show.

It was crazy to see this, framed and on TV. The show is Partners, and we'll see if the piece makes another guest appearance this season.

pictures my friend sent from ABC website and screen shot:



Friday night we went to two art events. A reception for Irene Abraham at the Art Institute of San Diego.

And then Art Boxed San Diego.

I enjoyed seeing both and getting out there to support the artists and arts in San Diego. What I realized was that not once did I think about me and my art in context to a space of event. I did not question, why can't I show my art here, or why wasn't I asked to participate. The interest in getting my art there within these contexts is gone. I am perfectly satisfied with how my art is getting out there. The free art: cart project continues, as I make more work for it, and in a way is extended through Art Pic, which rents and sells work to the movie and TV industry.

It is very nice not to think, why not me.


life is trying

There are things happening in my life that have been very stressful. My mother has had a stroke, and now my Dad is having some health issues. I am not close by to be of any physical help, and I can see it is a lot for my sister and her partner. It is not bringing out the best in any of us. My stress level had been so high that I kept getting sick.

I am trying to really know that we cannot worry about what the future might bring. This is not easy to do. Our washing machine stopped working. We chose not to worry about it, figured out we can wash at the laundry room next door, and when we had the money we'd have someone look at it, and we went on. Yesterday a repair man came, and it turned out the pump was not working, and it just needed to be cleaned out. I learned how to get to the pump, clean it, probably even replace it. I found a handkerchief that was in the pump, and learned that all small items need to be washed in a mesh laundry bag, not just my bras. I can see from this experience it was much more productive to accept what was happening, figure out a way to live with it, and not worry.

I wish my sister and her partner would not worry so much about what might be, physically or financially with my parents, and themselves. I wish they could take this opportunity to maybe work a bit less and spend some quality time with my parents, do some fun things, and not just run in and out, dropping off food, and checking in. They are very lucky that they are close by and can have such an opportunity. 

The future really is so unpredictable. This can be disabiling, or energizing.

I hope the lesson will stay with me.