A very small piece of cracker went down wrong. My airway constricted and I could not breathe. Panic set in and breathing got more difficult. Foresta was there and I tired to get him to help me. But what could he do. There was nothing blocking my airway, the Heimlich would do nothing. I tried to calm myself, he got me water. I knew I had to calm myself; focus on breathing, slowly my breathing became easier.
It all happened so fast and at the same time seemed like a very long time.
It has happened one other time. It’s like I breath in a small piece of food and bang, airway constricts and I cannot breath. I think I need to pay attention when I am eating, eat slower, and chew, chew, chew before swallowing.
Asphyxiation, I felt like death was so close.
It is strange to think how easy it is to die.
Last night lying in bed I thought about death. I thought I could have let myself die, but I did not.
I wonder if I could ever let death come easily.
The other time this happened someone said I would have passed out, relaxed and started breathing again. I wonder.
Today we did a bike ride. It was grey and cold. I saw what I assumed where homeless children and adults. I have seen a lot of homeless recently. I can see it is very difficult.
I am very grateful today to be alive and have a home.