12.30.2010

what a difference a day makes

We are missing our Petzel

A lot......
Maybe that’s way I was having such a difficult time with the New Years cards.


Tonight I’m busy making cards, and it is bringing much joy to my heart.

12.29.2010

tradition cards

Every year
Since ?
1981-82?
I have made New Years cards and mailed them out.
I started to make the card for 2011
but I want to give it up
Should I
Should I let go of my tradition

I am so over it
but I like making cards
I don’t know what to do

12.25.2010

Petzel 1994-2010

We have known for awhile that he was dying. I was conflicted about what to do. I wanted him to be at home, to choose his time, but was afraid he might suffer.

Last night he ate little and this morning nothing. He waited for us to wake up this morning. His breathing very shallow. We spent time with him and at one moment when I glanced over I saw him take his last breath. 

We spend a little more time with him.

He was a very good boy, taking care of his nephews and us. Always guarding, wanting to be let out and shaking the screen door to come in.

He would greet us at the gate, do yoga and meditate with me, and when we lived in Colorado he’d walk the property with us.
Although he will no longer be part of our daily activities we are forever connected.
Thank you for being such a wonderful member of our family. 

We love you dearly.


Posts with Petzel:
agingthiseasy

I wish I had included Petzel more in my external, internal dialogue. Because there is time, I will have to do better to include Kombu and Firewalker.


And in his death he gave us a gift. Dec 25, no longer just a commercial Christian holiday.

12.23.2010

12.20.2010

a river runs thru

We got weather.
Which changed my plans from a bike ride to a neighborhood hike.





When walking in weather my face gets a workout from the constant grin locked in.

12.19.2010

people

This morning I saw how my life is surrounded by generous creative and enlightened people.
I am very fortunate and grateful.
Thank you for the light you bring into my life.

12.17.2010

revolution time?

Why can’t the rich pay more taxes.
Maybe its because they want their money to go to their schools. Like the beautiful private school Francis Parker, with it’s wonderful new campus, with everything that makes learning fun, exciting, and valuable. Computers, math labs, science labs, art classes, even an art gallery.


Why can’t they support public schools, like Cherokee Point which also has  a newly built campus, but lacks much of what the private school has.


The rich have their money to go where it directly benefits them while the rest of society can continue a downward cycle of being under educated, thereby disadvantaged, thereby having to work for minimum wage for the rich.
Why are the rich so selfish. Is it fear that they will not have, that they will go without?
There is no trickle down, nothing trickles down except more poverty.

The Beatles - Revolution (Live)


From the Washington Post 12/17/10:
The bill that Obama signed Friday comes at a cost. It virtually guarantees that he will not fulfill during his first term one of the major promises of his 2008 campaign, which was to roll back the income tax rates for the wealthiest Americans. That rankles many liberal activists in theDemocratic Party who believe Obama should have fought harder before yielding on that issue. the article

12.08.2010

I hope you will survive

It appears the US government is applying much pressure to shut down Wikileaks and destroy the founder Julian Assange.

This is very disturbing.

The United States, democratically elected government, is us, the people. Therefore why is there so much secrecy.
It is time we the people know what our government is doing. We have the right to know.



The all and mighty OZ, it’s time to bring down the curtain so we can see who and what you are.

The practice of secrecy is not in our best interest, it fosters an environment of greed and unchecked power. The persistence of fear and paranoia needs to end. This should not be allowed to continue and  I applaud organizations like Wikileaks.



12.07.2010

a gift

Over and over again I am continually impressed with working for this company.
Today as I drove up to work I saw everyone in the parking lot. I went up and asked what was going on. A fire drill. Then I saw this big semi truck and our store manager got up there and started to talking to us. Saying how great we’ve all been and that our holiday present was really something we could all use, it could save us money, help us get fit, and ..... I’m freaking out because I have not punched in and afraid I’ll be late.
Then the doors of the truck open for us to see what our gift would be and I could not believe it.

How unbelievably awesome.

I brought mine home and will assemble it, get a couple of really good locks, and use it to get to work.
Thank you IKEA! And Anne for finding my online application, contacting me, interviewing me, and hiring me.

12.03.2010

its that season

I must find a way to not let this holiday season get to me. There is so much about it I have issues with. Working retail will not be easy.
Instead of focusing on the things that make me shake my head. 

Like the line of cars making it’s way to the Balboa Park for December Nights, with all that junk for sale and to eat, and blocking my path as I negotiate to cross the street.
I must embrace the fact that this event closed down the Laurel Street Bridget to those same cars.


12.01.2010

2.5 weeks

I was slipping deeper and deeper into an uncontrollable diet of sugar, wheat and cheese, as I felt worse and worse and my weight started to go up.
How could I gain control. In my head I knew it was dangerous for my health and I still could not stop.
It’s been 2.5 weeks back on the Tibetan Yellow Phlegm disorder diet,  but a vegetarian on the Tibetan Yellow Phlegm disorder diet wasn’t enough, I could and I know would, cheat with dairy. Let’s go vegan. If I couldn’t control myself for myself maybe I could do it for ethical and environmental reasons.
2.5 weeks and I feel so much better. I am one who has to be strict. A little cheating leads to more and more. I hope I can learn this lesson, selfishly for my health, as well as for the wellbeing of other creatures, and the environment.
GO VEGAN!!!

11.28.2010

my rock

Finally got back out on the bike today.
It was cold for San Diego and windy, but clear clear clear.
Didn’t get a picture of how clear and beautiful it was.

We did ride by this painting on a rock in Lemon Grove.


11.25.2010

Thanksgiving 2010

It is easy sometimes to focus on things gone bad and lost.

I know how fortunate I have it.
I am grateful.


I will try to not worry.

11.17.2010

aging is not always pretty

Our cats are aging, just like us, but they are closer to their end.

Petzel has kidney disease and is extremely arthritic, but he stays very active for his 16 year old deteriorating body. I think dementia is also setting in as he sits around yelling at the air. He eats, drinks, sleeps, and is more accepting of affection. He looks like a mess all the time, even after he gets his special cat wipe bath. Selfishly I wish he would gain weight and clean himself up. 
I cannot tell if he is unhappy, and if I knew, what would I do.

Applied Design

The abstract colorful paintings, painted and/or cut-out fabrics, and beach trash clowns part of Collection Applied Design a Kim MacConnel Retrospective, at MCASD La Jolla, I found full of joy and delight. 






It was like taking in an abundance of candy without the sugar and fat which makes me sick.

11.14.2010

Concert and Crash

Friday night, Nov 12 at the California Center for the Arts Art Museum.
I had all kinds of expectations about this event and I was excited to finally be there.
The concert included music by Joel P West, who scored the music for the fort. He was accompanied by Kelly Bennett on the violin, Meg & Brian, and story interludes from Andrew Gumm.


Then we were seated for dinner to have a delicious meal specially prepared with the fort as muse, partaking in fabulous food and conversation.


We then prepared for the rest of the evening, putting on pj’s, stacking out sleeping areas, and getting comfortable for the movie (Hook), which I’d never seen.

Then to sleep.


Breakfast and more conversation in the morning, and more time in the fort.




As we left Wes was busy at work.

The experience was beyond all my expectations.

Time spent in an incredible space with creative generous people.

I cannot find words to express how grateful I am to have had this experience.
California Center for the Arts, and Wes Bruce - THANK YOU!!!